My hands are cold from holding onto Hopes

Have you ever felt like, there's this unknown misery in you, like you feel upset for no reason at all? Maybe its because of smthg someone had said earlier but it'd only hit you now, or maybe its the day's events all holding you down. You just know its not pms, its this really horrible feeling, smthg close to.. betrayal but its not it. I don't know how to put my finger on what I'm feeling now. I'm feeling so annoyed and irritated and like the biggest bitch ever. Maybe I do know what's happening but I'm just not willing to face it, maybe I do know how I really feel, but I'm too ashashed to admit it. I'm so torn between gg to schl and skipping it tmrw.
On the other hand, I need to know, I need to know..

-

What a chunk of emoness and upsetness. Anw was the first day I had lessons with the China girls. Abs on my right and Sf on my left, it was so nice to finally have them back again. Talking to Abs and Lou infront non stop and Sf constantly shh-ing us. Their absence in my life was so redundant. Hmm well, went out with Chai after school. We finally caught up! I had alot of fun irritating and annoying her, hahaha. ('Choy!') Inside joke, grins. Recieved a rather disturbing msg from a friend, so I rushed to meet her after that. So she came over and stuff la, but it was nice seeing her after quite sometime. You, take care alright? Yknw I love you so and so does DS! Had a rather long and whiny phonecall with Sf after that, a quiet phonecall with Abs and a damn loud and irritated-us phonecall with R-lim.

The only thing I'm looking forward to is zoo on sunday with the 2 lovely people whom I had made plans with since a month ago plus the magic show on Saturday with Mingzhen. Aiya I don't know why I'm feeling so damn annoyed. Rar, I should probably like go seclude myself now. Bye and someone tell me, what does it mean when you've been dreaming abt a certain someone more than 2 nights in a row? Its getting confusing.

I hope you know that you were my best friend
Tonight I said goodbye, but I should have said more
Thanks for the best time of my life.

Come home, now that you're gone
I've finally realized
That you were the best
Come home, I won't forget the times that we had
I'm wishing that you weren't a part of my past
@ 10:47 PM